Would it be too predictable to call this post 'Aloha'?
We didn’t end up doing too much in Hawaii (with apostrophe “Hawai’i” or without? Please vote on the right) because we realised that this is the last of our beach destinations and with reports of snowstorms in New York we thought it would be best to make the most of it.
The weather’s been pretty average at times, for example it was blowing a gale all day today but on Saturday the needle on my ‘Ski Dubai’ thermometer topped the scale at over 50 Celsius when I left it in the sun. The sun has come out everyday between 11am and midday and generally lasts until the sun goes down before the torrential evening rain sets in – this is perfect for a combination of sunbathing and tubing as we’ve been getting drunk and not needing to surface until after 11am in order to get a Denny’s down us before sunbathing.
Our first night here was Friday (the 45 hour day) so we decided to see what Waikiki on a Friday is like. As it turns out it’s rather good. There were plenty of tourists about (including this fella below who Pezza fancied, I think he looks a bit like Toby Anstis…
The evening went on and we got totally smashed, the Seattle bloke picked up out $130 tab and he must have tipped well because the barman rewarded him with a triple Jager. With the Sammy B still sitting a little heavy in his belly Pezza came to the rescue, jumped on the bar and chugged it down. The barman predicted she would die in 20 minutes. 21 minutes later our lovely hotel bathroom looked like this…
Notice how it’s even on the wall!!!
So Hawaii’s been good (Would that be “Hawai’i's been good”?) but we’ve stuck to the holiday formula of ‘sunbathe and drink’. We didn’t see the volcano and Pezza still thinks Pearl Harbour is just a film with the Liv Tyler’s bloke out of Armageddon in it. What we did have is a brilliant hotel with unrivalled views and a ruddy good time.
As I sit here in the hospitality suite at the hotel my attention is once again drawn to the toilet I mentioned last time. I discovered something even more astonishing. A little button with a picture of a chap on the loo with a dotted line emanating from loo towards chap with the word ‘rear’ on it. What a button this turned out to be. One firm press and a jet of pleasantly warm water shoots towards the ‘necessary area’ and leaves you shower fresh. There’s even a dial to control the pressure (I turned it all the way up) and a ‘front button’ for the ladies.
So it’s off to LA next where we’ll probably do a bit more. I’ve just printed off my tickets for the Universal Studios park and we’re staying in the hotel used in Pretty Woman (Richard Gere’s hotel, not the apartment Julia Roberts stays in).
Love n hugs.
xxx
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Sometimes, when pronouncing a word, it has a break. When writing that word, the break is indicated by an apostrophe. Thus, we see Hawai’i because we say Hah why ee and not Hah why. This is a rare use of the apostrophe.